Crawl - Edward Lorn

 Why is this douchnosel driving you to your mom's Juliet? Just drive yourself!


 Huh, Juliet and Colt. I like those names. Good character names.


 Hmmm, I could go for some waffles


Oh. No. No waffles. Kidding about the waffles.


Sucks that you bought a Subaru. I bet you wish you were driving a Miata about right now, dying would have been better methinks.


Aaahhhauauauaahahahhhh. Ugghaheaa. Blaaaaaa.


*puts down kindle shakes body vigorously to rid myself of images* 




*cries, cringes, carries on*


I'm certain I can army crawl faster than that. Certain.


Why did I read this at 11:52pm? What is wrong with me?  



Welp. I was creeped. Mission accomplished. Good read!