Bearing My Soul: A Paranormal Werebear Shifter Romance - Ellen Graves

(Edited Re-post)

 

Oh man. This book sucked.  It took me 4 days to read something like 87 pages. If, by some miracle, this book was intentionally bad and I were to find out it was actually some poorly done parody, then I would give it another 1/2 star for trying.

 

Firstly, Here is the book blurb (from Amazon)...

 

Chronicling the legacy of a prominent Washington family of shape-shifters was supposed to be an exciting experience for genealogist Haley Delano. But not so exciting it thrust her into the chaotic world of murder, lust, and a centuries old family feud.

Haley quickly realizes this is not going to be an ordinary job, even without the brooding and sexy family head, David, thwarting her every effort to uncover his family's secrets.

Even when she isn't trying to make sense of the unsolved murder that split his family apart generations before, the hulking bear-shifter seems to be everywhere she turns.

It's proving terribly distracting, even if his strong and silent act and handsome face has nothing to do with it. At least, that's what she's telling herself.

But as Haley comes closer to uncovering the truth will she unwittingly expose a cover-up that is still being fiercely protected today? What will she do if the man she has found herself falling for will protect his family at any cost?

 

 

THIS BLURB IS NOT EVEN REMOTELY about the book. The characters are Andrea and Jonathan, who are neighbors. Andrea has run away from her family problems and taken a summer job keeping up a historic home in a small town populated by 'berserkers'.

I'm sure I should contact someone about the blurb being outrageously incorrect. It's probable that the person that authored the book DID NOT write that blurb. Mostly because the blurb actually sounds pretty interesting and is written fairly coherently. The book is written shoddily in first person narrative in the most simplistic fashion. I wonder if it's ripped from something else...

 

Bearing my Soul: A Paranormal Werebear Shifter Romance

 

Let's talk about how three of those words mean roughly the same thing. Redundancy abounds in BMS, here are some other stellar sentences:

 

"The solitude still lingered and I still sat alone."

 

"I must have dozed because I awoke to the morning sunlight bewildered and confused."

 

"Now, I was somewhere else, but I was unwelcome and unwanted."

 

"It was just me, as I sat alone in the calm of the forest."

 

Later, we progressed from merely repetitive narrative to awesome alliteration:

 

"My heart raced wildly with gluttonous guilt while I studied him."

 

"I stole a licentious look at his butt as he did."

 

"We sat down, my torn shirt falling open, his lusciously large gonads cupping between his thighs."

 

"My body swooned sweetly from the sound of it."

 

"Craving chills went up my spine."

 

( Okay, this one doesn't count towards alliteration, but I'm including it anyway because I'm not so sure that it wasn't supposed to be alliteration and perhaps the author doesn't understand alliteration. Well, that's not very gracious of me. I really included it because It's a pet-peeve of mine when characters shiver, and 'craving chills' is dangerously close to shivering.)

 

 

I couldn't help but highlight these two fun uses of the word titilate:

 

"The world swirled around me with buzzing delight, as he titillated my lips and clit with his tongue."

 

"I shook violently and I could feel myself releasing a spray of titillating hot liquid."

 

And I couldn't stop with the highlighting. Here’s the interesting part of the story where Jonathan must explain himself to Andrea after she witnesses him shifting from bear to man:

 

 “It’s called a berserker. It’s where the word ‘berserk’ comes from. Basically, I can turn into a bear.”

Oh! Okay. Got it.

 

But wait...later he says:

"Plus, I don’t lose control."

 

Methinks someone should look up the definition of 'berserk' or the origin of 'berserker'.

 

Ooh, I liked the character insight in this one:

 

"I stared at him for a long moment, stunned by his reaction. Then, I went quiet with anger. He was mocking me, making fun of me being hunted by a giant bear. The irritation dredged up an odd excitement."

 

Nothing like an emotionally unstable heroine, they really add a touch of crazy to any good romance. Of course, a touch of stupid is good for creating the flawed characters I love as well, as seen here:

 

"I considered for a moment the possibility of running deeper into the forest, but I knew I could never outrun this beast. Instead, I offered pleading whimpers as I watched it."

 

 

For a little non-con spice, I offer you this tid-bit:

 

"I spread my legs a little and ran trembling fingers through my wavy hair, gently fluffing it for him."

 

"He pawed and kissed my breasts with a fervent hunger."

 

 

I got this for free on Amazon last Friday (or Thursday maybe, I can’t remember), and as of today it’s $2.99. I would not recommend this for free, so at $2.99 I’m somewhere in the vicinity of warning you off.